Patriarchy Stress Disorder
Patriarchy Stress Disorder or PSD affects a significant part of our inner self. This is the reason why even if we are successful in other aspects of our lives, we sometimes feel empty. My guest, Psychologist Dr. Valerie Baker is no stranger to Patriarchy Stress Disorder. She overcame Patriarchy Stress Disorder using some healing tools which she will teach us in today’s episode.
First of all, Dr. Valerie Baker says this is not at all about women against men or men against women. But instead, this is about a system that has existed for thousands of years. She also says it has chopped us up from the fullness of our authentic expression.
Dr. Valerie Baker journey in discovering Patriarchy Stress Disorder began with a health crisis. Back then, Dr. Valerie Baker’s life from the outside looking in looked perfect.
“I checked all of the boxes that the society told me I needed to check. First, I had four degrees including two masters and a Ph.D.,” shares Dr. Valerie Baker. “Then I started three businesses and had a successful career. I married a great guy, had a wonderful daughter, and a lovely house in New York City suburbs.”
Am I Happy?
Dr. Valerie Baker did a good job convincing herself that she was happy. She made sure she didn’t have time to reflect on how she was doing. Until one day, Dr. Valerie Baker ended up in the emergency room with symptoms of a stroke.
The incident led to Dr. Valerie Baker experiencing the left side of her body feels limp. It turned out to be stress. Dr. Valerie Baker didn’t realize she was running high-stress levels.
“Being in the ER for a day gave me space to reflect on my life. I hadn’t had that space in a long time. It made me uncomfortable. I didn’t understand why. Why was I so stuck?” pondered Dr. Valerie Baker.
She adds, “I realized the active ingredient in healing for all my patients both emotional and physical was mind body spirit trauma resolution. Even for people who think they didn’t have trauma.”
Seeing A Change
Once Dr. Valerie Baker started used mind body spirit resolution tools, she started seeing significant shifts. She had a light bulb moment regarding the trauma we all share. Men and women both experience trauma but in different ways.
“If we accept that being oppressed is traumatic, then we can see that all of us are born with this information that it’s not safe for a woman in this world. And that we need to create some adaptations,” said Dr. Valerie Baker.
She adds, ” Patriarchy Stress Disorder affects us all. This realization was very empowering because I realized there was nothing wrong with me. Understanding that there is nothing to fix, there is something to heal is liberating.”
The mission behind Dr. Valerie Baker’s work is helping women create an analogy for their health, well-being, relationships and their work in the world. Her work is about healing from the inside out.
“In this battle, there is no enemy. It’s not women against men but rather us all healing. And it’s about looking at the truths of the situation deeper and using tools to heal,” said Dr. Valerie Baker.
Where Trauma Comes From
Dr. Valerie Baker reveals that there is so much trauma in the workplace. And this is the reason why there are offices right now offering training. This is to help people understand the internal workings of the trauma that creates blind spots, biases, and factors that messes everything up.
“There are so many stressors apart from the trauma that we have inherited. And there are so many stressors of being a woman in a patriarchal world,” Dr. Valerie Baker said. “We have to police ourselves all the time. And we are being policed all the time. There’s always something wrong to be found with a woman. What’s worse is the inner critic. That is a big part of how PSD manifests.”
Dealing With Trauma
All those voices inherited and imprinted can be vicious. Dr. Valerie Baker says it doesn’t go away or get easier the more we accomplish. Because ultimately, we can have all the accomplishments. But until we heal the trauma that makes us feel worthless, it’s going to be there.
“When we heal trauma on the inside, the environment around us and the relationship with ourselves shift as well. No matter how much trauma we inherited, we can shift it in one generation. We can shift within ourselves and not pass it down anymore,” said Dr. Valerie Baker.
In dealing with trauma, Dr. Valerie Baker shares a time when she had a spontaneous memory of what it was like to be a newborn baby. And what it is like to be in her mama’s womb. Recalling her past, Dr. Valerie Baker says her mom had severe anxiety. And that Dr. Valerie Baker was also allergic to absolutely everything.
“I realized that level of trauma. And it brought me so much closer to my daughter. It’s a deeper moment of connection. Don’t stifle that voice. It’s your guide. If you stifle it, something is going to suffer,” Dr. Valerie Baker advises.
She adds, “When the demand exceeds our capacity, it usually overwhelms us. And it becomes traumatic. All the trauma comes from when we were little. Because we had the least sources to understand and process what was going on. Plus, we didn’t have the permission and opportunity.”
Dr. Valerie Baker shares that in helping others especially adults, they usually realize situations that they would never have thought was traumatic. It stems from emotional or verbal violations of our boundaries as children and growing up which are pretty much constant. It’s traumatic because children don’t have much capacity or tools.
“Our natural reaction to being scared and feeling unsafe would be to run or fight. Those emotional reactions of fight and flight are interrupted. We don’t have an opportunity to discharge,” said Dr. Valerie Baker.
She adds, “And that charge of fear and emotion gets stuck in the body. It begins to clog the energy channel. And it also happens with grief and loss. Adults have so much unprocessed grief. Because in our culture, we don’t do grief well”.
Dr. Valerie Baker also says this is because there is such a limited range of emotional expression that we are allowed under patriarchy. Men are allowed to express anger and aggression. They are not allowed to express grief, nurturing, being tender or vulnerable emotions. Women, on the other hand, are not allowed to express anger. We can express nurturing and vulnerability. But expressing grief is also not okay.
Dr. Valerie Baker likes working with groups because it can be empowering. A good support system is essential because sometimes, there are positive emotions that are unprocessed.
“Positive information has not been essential to our survival. It takes ten full seconds for us to experience a positive experience through the five senses,” said Dr. Valerie Baker.
Five-Step Jailbreak System
For us to have a jailbreak, Dr. Valerie Baker says the process can be stressful. Hence, the tools that she teaches first create safety and bring down the nervous system activation. So, it feels safe and not stressful for us to create that change.
Dr. Valerie Bakers also encourage people who need help to work with her so she can assist in addressing several issues that are linked to trauma. Rather than resort to anti-depressants or drugs, a mind, body and spirit resolution is useful.
It’s all about helping people finally making sense of the issues that contribute to their stress or trauma. To know more about her 5-step jailbreak system, check out Dr. Valerie Baker’s website to download the free e-book and audio training.
Dr. Valerie Baker is a psychologist, author, and founder of Her Genius, Inc., dedicated to helping self-made women, their partners, and teams fully thrive in their work in the world, relationships, and health. Based on the cutting-edge scientific evidence of genetic transmission of trauma, Dr. Valerie Baker has discovered and pioneers healing Patriarchy Stress Disorder (PSD), which her clients have dubbed “the missing link” to their ultimate success, happiness, freedom, productivity, and fulfillment.
Dr. Valerie Baker is a sought-after speaker at conferences and corporations committed to women’s empowerment. Discover how PSD may be affecting you, your relationships, and your business and download Dr. Valerie Baker’s 5-step “PSD jailbreak” system at www.PSDandME.com.
Psychologist, author, and speaker, Dr. Valerie Baker pioneers healing Patriarchy Stress Disorder™ (PSD)–the trauma of 1000s of years of oppression imprinted in women’s DNA. She calls PSD the invisible inner prison that keeps women from experiencing their ultimate success and happiness.
Dr. Valerie Baker holds a MEd in Psychological Counseling from Teachers College of Columbia University and a Ph.D. from the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology. In over 20,000 hours of her work as a therapist and coach, Valerie has helped thousands of women break out of the PSD jail and create amazing relationships, businesses, careers, and health that are only possible on the outside. Dr. Valerie Baker is excited to share her revolutionary PSD jailbreak system with you today and help you claim your ultimate success and happiness.
Get Connected With Dr. Valerie Baker!
Recommended Reading By Dr. Valerie Baker!
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk, MD.